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Have you ever found yourself talking to international students and not being sure that you were understood? Then asking yourself afterwards what are you expected to do? Or did you feel like you were literally speaking two different languages? 

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Most likely these feelings are not related just to language proficiency but also to your or your students' communication styles.

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In this project you will have the opportunity to learn more about different communication and conflict styles, so you can communicate more effectively (and appropriately) across cultures.��

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Before we explore different communication styles, let’s take a look at your own communication preferences. Consider the communication behaviours in the list below and note any that you find irritating, frustrating, uncomfortable or annoying when you interact with individuals who talk in that way.

• Not answering questions directly
• Insisting on calling you by title, Ms, Mr, Mrs, formal title
• Making requests directly
• Using a lot of silence and pauses in conversation
• Talking mostly about themselves
• Speaking slowly
• Speaking loudly
• Speaking quietly
• Apologising frequently
• Interrupting frequently

Do you think everyone finds the same behaviours frustrating? Ask at least three people which one of these behaviours they find most annoying, and compare their responses to yours. Most likely they will react differently, as we all have different communication styles

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Edward T. Hall was a pioneer in the field of intercultural communication who introduced an understanding of the way we communicate. He showed that our default style, and what is considered acceptable in a group or society, is highly influenced by the group’s culture. This acceptable way of communicating is learned early on in life and is reinforced through positive feedback and rewards over time.

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“One of the most effective ways to learn about oneself is by taking seriously the cultures of others. It forces you to pay attention to those details of life which differentiate them from you.” Edward T. Hall (1976) 

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Hall was the first to explain that communication can be divided into so-called high context and low context communication systems.��

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Low context communicators express meaning explicitly in verbal communication, and they expect others to do the same. All important information is stated.��

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High context communicators, on the other hand, don't verbalise everything explicitly. Instead, they rely on context or a shared understanding among all involved in the conversation to communicate their message or intention.��

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The above graphic illustrates these two ways of communicating. On the right, you can see low-context communication:

Here, the speaker is expected to construct a clear verbal message that contains all necessary information and can be easily understood by the receiver. On the left, you can see high context communication where most of the information might be left unsaid and the receiver of that message needs to be looking for more clues in the context.

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Let's look at this in a bit more depth, starting with low context communication. Here, the speaker is expected to construct a clear message that can be easily understood by the receiver. Low context communicators will often say they “say what they mean, and mean what they say”. They will sometimes ask: “what is the point? Can you get to the point?” What is specifically said is more important than what is left unsaid. The verbal message is the key to communication; it is often very detailed.

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High context communication requires the receiver of the message to “read between the lines”. The speaker may use non-verbal language, hand gestures, facial expression, and often few words to express their message. Speakers and listeners rely on shared cultural and social understanding to recognise the message. Many things are left unsaid.��

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The context of the communication is at least as important as what is being said.

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Let's take a look at an example to understand what high-context communication looks like in a real-life situation: If we consider having a conversation in our home with our family, there would be many shared understandings – things that we can communicate with few or no words. This could be as simple as who sits where at the dinner table, what a glance toward the washing up sink may mean at the end of a meal, or expressing respect or gratitude to a family member. We do not need detailed verbal explanation because the context is understood. Imagine if an international student comes into our home: they may not be able to understand these unspoken messages and might misinterpret or miss the message altogether.��

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When high and low context communicators are attempting to communicate together it can be difficult, especially if they are not aware of these different styles.

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For those who communicate in a low context style, they want lots of detail, and it is often missing when their high context colleagues are expressing themselves. This can lead to frustration, and the inability to move forward. They are waiting for more information.��

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Yet, high context communicators often think the style of communication co

ming from low context people is so detailed as to be condescending or unnecessary. “Why are you telling me this stuff, of course I can see that…”. They can feel frustrated, offended, or confused as a result.��

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So, where do you think you stand? Are you more low context or high context? Do you tend to be more direct or indirect? What about the international students with whom you work? 

Understanding your preferred style and those of your students and peers will help you better navigate different situations and better support everyone in their intercultural adjustment.��

When differences in communication styles leave you confused: Satoshi’s story

Let’s consider:

• What is actually happening in these scenarios?
• What are the communication styles you can identify in the story?
• What could be some cultural reasons behind the behaviours?
• What suggestions or tips could you give Satoshi to be effective in this new environment?
• How could you support Satoshi in communicating more appropriately with his host family, basketball friends and at university?
  

Let’s consider:

• What is actually happening in these scenarios?
• What are the communication styles you can identify in the story?
• What could be some cultural reasons behind the behaviours?
• What suggestions or tips could you give Satoshi to be effective in this new environment?
• How could you support Satoshi in communicating more appropriately with his host family, basketball friends and at university?

We can identify some cultural differences happening in Satoshi’s scenario:

• Satoshi is probably more indirect in his communication than his teammates and he is perceiving a more direct communication approach as being aggressive or rude.
• Some other cultural reasons behind the behaviours could be related to individualism vs collectivism. Satoshi could be more used to being invited to join activities and spend more time with the family. He could also be less used to taking initiative, speaking up and being more independent. You can learn more about this here.��

We can help Satoshi:��

• By explaining some cultural characteristics of life in New Zealand and some of the expectations that families, teachers and peers might have.��
• By asking more questions to help him reflect on what others might be thinking, what the family would like to see, what are the coach's expectations, etc. Asking him more questions may help him see the other people’s perspectives and become more curious about kiwi culture.��
• Be more effective in communicating by making sure he attends orientations and that the orientations include content on communication styles and other cultural dimensions differences.��
• By introducing him to the D.I.V.E. model and going through the situation using this model. (You can find the model later in this project)

And there are plenty of similar stories of international students struggling to understand some situations due to different communication styles. Have a look at this great to further explore differences in communication. The “Stinky Tea Towel” video was developed by Steffen and William as a way to see communication styles in action. This video shows a German student trying to learn the best way to communicate with others in New Zealand.

It all sounds very interesting and the different communication styles in the video are even funny, but how do you actually improve your skills to be more effective and appropriate when communicating with those with different cultural backgrounds? Let’s practice.Have a look at this list of direct phrases and try to change them into more indirect phrases: